Monday, March 24, 2008
You've got questions, I've got answers aplenty
The Rules:
I'm the type of person that lives by many self-imposed rules so as such, this project is no different. Before I began I came up with some things that I decided I would absolutely not do, but now that I've started things are getting modified; however, the spirit of the law is what's important here.
First there are the technology rules: No cell phone and no iPod.
I need to bring my phone so I can tell time since I don't use a watch but I've vowed not to take calls while adventuring. The only reason I took a call on the J was because I had plans later in the day that needed to be discussed. I felt very bad for answering even though it was legitimate. I won't do it again.
Yes, I have an iPod. No, I did not break down and buy it for myself. Yes, I listen to it all the time on the bus. No, I do not listen to it on adventures. I don't even bring it along.
I think that these two things would be distracting and allow for a less authentic bus experience. Who wants that? Not me.
Second Rule: No getting off.
I don't necessarily foresee this being a problem for me but it's always good to have a rule you know you can keep. Also, if the bus breaks down and I have to get off, I will wait for another one, except if the weather is really bad. Then I will stop living my dream and get real because I hate cold weather.
Third Rule: I must start at the first stop and get off at the very last stop.
Originally I tried to ride the 1 line to start but mis-read the MUNI map and got on at the SECOND stop. Even though it was only a block away from the first stop, I couldn't let myself just go with it. The whole point of this project is to a) see the entire bus line, and b) stay aware that many of us only follow a route from certain points, rather than experiencing the whole thing. The most interesting thing, for me, about MUNI and other forms of transportation is that in one stretch of road there are so many different lives and sights all connected. So it's very important to go from start to finish in order to get a correct sense of what's going on.
Fourth Rule: Talking to people during an adventure.
When I first started this, I was adamant: I will not talk to anyone else. I'm not going to get involved. I will just sit on the bus and write about what I see. About 10 minutes into the first ride, I knew this was a mistake. It's almost impossible to ride public transit and not interact with the public. Someone will talk to you or look at you, or someone will do something and you'll react to it. Non-participation is not really an option. Especially for me with a notebook open and a camera out. People seem curious, but don't want to ask questions (probably because I look so
threatening.) The good news for the curious is that I'm revamping my business cards so that should take care of some of the silent questioning.
Fifth Rule: I will ride EVERY line.
I think this is the most important rule. Some bus lines are less desirable than others. Some go to the outskirts of town. Some are a pain to get to. Some have people we don't want to see. Some are dangerous.
No matter. This isn't about only riding the pretty, safe bus lines. It's about seeing and experiencing everything.
That being said, I'm not stupid. Sometimes it's better to go somewhere with a partner and I'm thinking about how I want to do that. If someone else comes along, there will be NO TALKING. I might even make us sit apart. The other person could contribute as a guest blogger. I haven't totally figured it out yet, so stay tuned.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
J - Church
Date: March 15, 2008
Weather Conditions: Breezy & Sunny
First Stop: Green Division Yard
Five other people get on: two thugish looking dudes, two tourists and a guy who looks half asleep. I debate which car to sit in, first or second? After a trip to the second car, I decide to sit in the first car, on the right side, behind the door.
Time: 12:01 p.m.
Stop: San Jose & Randall
The purple haired Glamour Grandma gets off slowly. I’m not sure who gets on, I’m caught up looking at the beautiful skyline of the city. We turn at 30th and now we’re on 30th and Dolores. We’re moving so quickly. My phone starts ringing and I feel stressed. I ignore my own rule and answer it. Ok, no more answering the phone. We pass through the area of
Time: 12:03 p.m.
Stop: Church & 30th
A lot of white, hip looking people and couples get on board. I’m overwhelmed by colorful skinny jeans, expensive shoes and jackets with careful detailing. I feel let down by the J-Church. You move so fast and your riders are so boring!
Time: 12:05 p.m.
Stop: Church & 27th
Time: 12:06 p.m.
Stop: Clipper & Noe
“It seems like it.”
Time: 12:08 p.m.
Stop: Church & 24th
Patrick is still throwing a fit. Seriously, Patrick? That was like two minutes ago. GET OVER IT. Patrick’s daddy and Family of Four Dad start talking about Irish baby names. Family of Four Dad tells Patrick’s daddy that his oldest daughter just had a third child and named her Rona. Her son is named Kieran. “Good, strong Irish names!” Patrick’s daddy is impressed. He has an Irish accent. Patrick’s daddy introduces himself to Family of Four Dad as “Patrick Kelly.” Family of Four Dad laughs and says, “I’m Terry Flynn! Nice to meet you.” Terry and his wife (Mom the Spy) are visiting from
Time: 12:11 p.m.
Stop:
Best outfit EVER.
We start passing through Dolores Park. It is mostly empty except for a few dogs and their owners. There’s a pickup basketball game happening and I see more people in green running to catch the train.
The best type of day to be at D-Park.
Time: 12:14 p.m.
Stop: Church & 18th
An Aside: I like to collect different things in my mind. It's sort of a recognition of patterns that I see. Most recent mental collections include people with canes (which made me wonder if polio is making a comeback,) people with partly burned-off faces (which makes me a) sad and b) think of this,) and dogs with shaved bodies but furry legs that look like legwarmers (Example.) Today I will collect ambiguous-looking people. Count so far: Two.
Time: 12:18 p.m.
Stop: Church & Market
We pass the big Safeway. I try to take a picture and while trying to juggle my notebook, bag, camera and pen, I end up writing all over my sweater. Ugh.
We stop at Church and Duboce. The girl-ish looking boy gets up and is replaced by an older man-ish looking woman. Amazing. Count: Three. She adjusts her baseball cap and fixes her really cool earphones. They are blue and yellow with a blue and yellow striped cord. She opens a book, “The King Must Die.”
The Dolores Park Girls and the back of Mom the Spy's head.
Time: 12:20 p.m.
Stop: Inside the MUNI Underground Tunnel
“Y’all wanna hear this, dontcha?” Without waiting for a response, out of nowhere he pulls out a boom box. Really though, where was that hiding?
The driver announces, “Van Ness Station.”
Boyfriend gets up and as the train pulls to a stop he bumps into Toothless who yells, “DON’T TOUCH ME! DO NOT TOUCH ME. What is wrong with you, man? Bobby Brown is part of my family, you should KNOW better!” Boyfriend looks thoroughly confused and just stands there with his head cocked. Toothless just shakes his head.
The doors open and close, people get on and off. We start moving again.
Time: 12:24 p.m.
Stop: Civic Center Station
We finally get to
I say, “Yeah, people get pretty excited about St. Patrick’s Day.”
She shakes her head.
Patrick Kelly starts giving little Patrick and older sister Mimi directions. “We’re going to get off at the next stop. You need to get in the stroller.” Mimi, who has the face of a Kewpie doll says, “The next one, Daddy?”
Patrick, in a calmer moment.
Time: 12:26 p.m.
Stop: Powell Station
Patrick, Patrick and Mimi make it out in a more organized fashion than they entered. The man-ish woman starts talking to me again. “It’s a long day of being Irish.”
“Yeah, very long day.”
“A long day of wearing green. I usually try to avoid this stuff. All the colorful people.”
“Yeah, well, it’s hard to avoid, you know. The city is always pretty crazy.”
She sighs. “Why can’t they celebrate on the 17th?”
I spare her the official Church explanation of not indulging during Holy Week and say, “Some people just like to get wasted and wear green as much as they can.” I wonder if she thinks it’s weird that I’m talking to her and writing, simultaneously.
Time: 12:27 p.m.
Stop:
The doors open and she exits. Her absolute sobriety and sanity is probably the funniest thing I’ve seen all day. I guess that maybe it’s weird when “crazy” starts seeming “normal” and “normal” starts seeming like a big joke.
I see The Ramones walking through the station. One guy is wearing a green track jacket that reads, “World Class Pub Champion.” He is carrying a 24-pack of Guinness. Of course.
The doors close, the train starts moving. The Crayola's and I are about the only ones left.
Crayon people, ready for the rain.
Time: 12:30
Last Stop: Embarcadero Station
Total Time: 38 minutes (approx.)
How I got there: 5 to Civic Center BART, off at Balboa Park Station
Where can you see more? HERE
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
F - Market & Wharves
Date: March 2, 2008
Weather Conditions: Warm & Sunny
Time: 11:30 a.m.
First Stop: 17th & Castro
I rush up the street from 18th. I’m thankful that the streetcar is there and pause to get my bearings. I can see that the streetcar says it’s going to Fisherman’s Wharf but I decide to err on the side of idiocy/safety and ask, “Does this go to Fisherman’s Wharf?”
The driver closes the streetcar doors and says, “Yup, all the way to the end. I’ll be right back, I have to go to the bathroom.” He darts across the street towards the Chevron station.
I think I’ve been on the streetcar once. The most I know about them is that they were made in Italy
The driver comes back and lets me on first. I decide to sit in the middle, opposite the back door. The seats are green leather, like on a school bus, and the inside is well-lit.
Not that MUNI is ever very quick, but it seems that the streetcar is especially slow. It feels jerky and there is a lot of traffic around us. Where is everyone is going?
There are two men sitting together a few seats in front of me. One of them gets on his phone and starts talking loudly. “Hey Sean! How are you? We’re in the Castro on this sunshine-y day!”
The noise of the streetcar makes it hard on my geriatric hearing to hear the rest of the conversation. Instead, I start to listen to the wheels clanking with the metal rail. It continues to be traffic-y and we pass Beck’s Motor Lodge. I wonder if it’s a popular place to stay. (Apparently not.)
Time: 11:37 a.m.
Stop: 15th & Castro
A tall middle aged woman with long curly hair dyed orange-red gets on with her dog. I resist the urge to pet the dog. I get the feeling it is a boy dog and it looks like a mutt, with patches of brown, black and white, mixed with some gray hairs. Not attractive. She sits two seats behind me and lets the mutt have the window seat. She starts speaking unintelligibly to the dog in baby-dog speak. I turn around to look; the dog isn’t paying attention to her, he’s waving his tail and slobbering on the window instead.
This is the new Mint, the old one is on 5th and Mission.
Also, we pass the Mint, not the hit or miss karaoke bar, but the place where they make money. The website says they no longer circulate money and do not allow visitors, but it seems like they manufacture silver coins.
Time: 11:40 a.m.
Stop: Laguna & Market
Three more people get on. The third person is a slow-moving transient looking man. He has a carnie type vibe; maybe in a past life? He is carrying a tote bag that says “Read, Write, Win!” He plops down in the double seat diagonal to me and takes out two pill containers. I strain to see what they are, no luck, something white. He quickly puts the bottles back into his pocket and pulls a wad of cash out of each pocket. He starts counting. There are lots of ones and fives.
T.C. takes care of some accounting on the streetcar.
I turn around to see what else is going on. A middle aged Asian guy is sitting next to the window a few seats back. Santa Claus on summer vacation is sitting next to him. Santa Claus has on red sunglasses and a red hat. Stylin’. They are too far away for me to hear properly, but it sounds like Santa’s friend is new to the Bay Area. Santa says, “I think you will like it here.” His friend says, “I think I will too.”
Time: 11:44 a.m.
Stop: Market & Van Ness
The driver announces, “Next stop, Van Ness and Market.” A few more people get on. A woman sits in front of me and another sits behind me. I feel slightly paranoid that they might think I’m weird, with my notebook and camera in my lap.
I try to hone my listening in on what’s going on but it’s pretty quiet. Instead I hear jingling coming from the car rails.
While straining to hear, I keep making eye contact with the transient carnie. He waves to me. I wave back. I wonder if I should be participating in my observations, it seems wrong. But whatever, this is my project, I’ll do what I want.
My simple wave opens Pandora’s box. “I’m part of the Grateful Dead, you know. I’m just not on stage right now.”
“Oh, yeah?”
“Ehhh, you don’t even know who that is. You’re too young. You’re not even listening. I could tell you about lots of things, Kerouac, but you don’t care.”
He throws his hands at me in defeat. I’m writing furiously trying to capture everything, I need to learn shorthand. He forgets he gave up on me and continues talking. “You know Calamity Jane? She was nothing but a self-promoting adoration thirster!” (Not totally knowing who Calamity Jane was, I pictured her as some sort of Joan Jett type character. Not quite.)
T.C. (Transient Carnie) looks at me and smiles. “If I get anyone to talk to me at all it’s a good thing.” I smile back. I’m captivated by the way his front teeth look like an upside down mountain range. It strains my mind to think about how people lose a half of a tooth. Does it hurt? How do you lose only half?
“You know what I’m up to today?”
“No, what?”
“Well! I’m going to Fifth and Bryant to take a shower. I have this free place to live and one of the great government loopholes, well not great I guess, it’s just a loophole, is that you can’t charge rent unless you have sanitary facilities.”
“Seriously?”
“Yeah! I live for free, I just have no bathroom. Nice area, too. Nice two-bedroom in
“Yeah, it’s really nice over there.” I see we are at Hyde and Market. People around me are clearly annoyed that I’m talking to T.C. Whatever, he may be loud, but he’s harmless.
T.C. continues, “I’ve lived there for 18 years, nothing’s gonna change now. It’s a pretty good deal.”
“That’s an awesome deal.”
T.C. forgets we are talking about rent and starts pointing at his blue and green tote bag. “You see this? It holds all my stuff.”
“Yeah, I see it’s from
“Yeah, whatever. I don’t know.” His eyes trail off for a second. He starts cracking up. “I’m going to take a shower right now. I’m going to get off at 5th and Market and walk that-a-way.” He motions south. “I know I have to travel to use the shower, but I don’t mind. You need to have an adventure every day. That’s what’s most important. So I like traveling to get to the shower. I get to go on an adventure!”
Suddenly I notice we’re at 7th and Market, lots of people get on, including an old Indian woman with pretty purple and white flowers. Despite the chaos, T.C. keeps talking. “This is my big adventure of the day—going downtown to take a shower. You know what? I moved here and I made beautiful art and music. But you know what I learned? Guess what?! You get bored, you gotta have adventure!
Time: 11:52
Stop: 5th and Market
“Upsey daisy! This is me!” T.C. tries to hop up. He keeps saying “Upsey daisy” over and over before looking at me and clarifying, “Upsey daisy, that means (something I can’t understand) in rock ‘n’ roll!” He exits. I guess I’ll never know. I look around. Everyone hates me. Oh well.
More people have come aboard. A young guy stands next to me, speaking an Asian language I can’t distinguish. There are so many people on board that I can’t see the back door anymore.
While waiting for the streetcar to move I watched people play chess.
We start moving. I look out the window. We pass shoe stores; we stop at 4th and Market. More people get on, the baby across from me starts fussing. Suddenly I notice there are a lot of babies around.
From out of nowhere I hear, “At least there’s someone to get lost with! Not like you! The last time you freaked out when we had to go to the hospital!” The speaker is a 30-something woman with full makeup, sunglasses and a white wrap shirt-black pants getup. She’s talking to a guy who looks like he played college football. I wonder what sort of adventure they went on.
An iBaby sits on the lap of the woman in front of me. (iBaby = baby with an Apple onesie.) Dad says, “That would be a great picture.” He holds the stroller between his legs, while Mom tries to maneuver the baby and the baby bag. He finally grabs the camera and tries to take a picture while still holding the stroller in his knees. Mom grabs the stroller in one hand and shifts the baby with the other arm. The picture looks stupid. I intercede. “Here, I can hold the stroller.”
“Oh, my gosh, thank you so much,” says Mom. “Smile, sweetie.” The baby does his best not to look bored. Snap! “Sweetie, say thank you, say thank you for holding the stroller!” The baby extends his hand towards me. We shake. The baby giggles. Seats open up in the back so they move. Asian teenage tourists take their spot and start posing and taking pictures.
I guess it's never too early to iNdoctrinate your child.
Time: 12:00 p.m.
Stop: Pine & Davis
The bus is still crowded. I notice that it is actually only cramped around the middle, it is clear in the back and the front. There is a group of teenagers near me. One girl with long black curly hair is chewing her gum loudly and says, “I like this bus. It’s tight!” She and her boyfriend start making out. Gross.
Time: 12:05 p.m.
Stop: Steuart & Mission
.
Or ELSE!
We pass the
I'm not sure about Central Park.
Time: 12:08 p.m.
Stop: No stop
The streetcar starts picking up speed. We are racing to the Wharf! A girl stands next to me. I have my notebook poised towards the window so she can’t see what I’m writing. I feel incredibly creepy and secretive and weird. Someone says, “Where’s
Time: 12:13 p.m.
Stop: Pier 39
We start inching up on Fisherman’s Wharf. The director of The Pouty Face Photo shoot says, “Next one!” Pouty Face seems anxious. “I hope so," she says. We stop, the doors open. I hear shrieking and, “Ooooh! We’re here!” I wonder if Fisherman’s Wharf is like the Eiffel Tower of San Francisco. If so, that’s kind of sad. I hear a keyboard and a saxophone. The doors close. Onwards. There are now only 11 people on board, including me and the driver. We continue speeding down the street. We get to Jefferson and Taylor and the driver announces, “Last stop, everyone out!” I gather up my stuff and am the last to exit.
People lining up for the ride outbound.
After I got off I hightailed it to In-N-Out and then walked down to
Land ho!
Total Time: 45 minutes (approx.)
How I got there: 5 to 33
How I bounced: 47 to 31
Where can you see more? HERE.